What makes you feel like a part of a community? I'm not going to complain, but discuss the awarenesses I've had about community. "Community" is a topic we encourage our RAs and our residents to learn of and put into practice while living in the residence halls. Its not a new topic to me, but one I want to explore a little more. many people will think of their community as their neighborhood where they live, or the group of individuals they spend the most time with or have a lot in common with. Anyone who attends a church would then have their church community that they are involved with. Our community ranges from 75 single female students, to the group of Hall Advisors who go through the same things I go through, to Oliver's classmates at school, to our ward that has boundaries that are about 14 blocks away.
I know that we very easily find excuses to NOT be a part of the community. (The students have lives of their own, we aren't really a part of this community--Evan has special needs, therefore noone else knows how we are feeling, or they are judging me because I can't control my children--Our ward is so far away and we are the only ones not an actual neighbor--the list could go on and on).
How do you get over excuses and just become part of the community? How can you bring that community feeling into yourself? One, I actually let my children play in the lobby which they love because its bigger than our living room, but they also love to interact with the 75 cute girls in our building and this is one way to do it. I don't have to hide in my room and just be "The Hall Advisor", but can be the random married woman with adorable children.
Two, we can actually be social with our coworkers and classmates other than just the immediate interactions through work and school. Hmm...gotta work on that one a little more. :)
Three, participate in ward functions. What? That's crazy talk! We went to a ward chili cookout last Friday, which was good. Not great, but good. And today at church, I had a good lesson about what's holding us back. What is the light that's not working that is distracting you from flying the plane? (For sense of that question, read story below from Dieter F. Uchtdorf)
"On a dark December night 36 years ago, a Lockheed 1011 jumbo jet crashed into the Florida Everglades, killing over 100 people. This terrible accident was one of the deadliest crashes in the history of the United States. A curious thing about this accident is that all vital parts and systems of the airplane were functioning perfectly—the plane could have easily landed safely at its destination in Miami, only 20 miles (32km) away.
During the final approach, however, the crew noticed that one green light had failed to illuminate—a light that indicates whether or not the nose landing gear has extended successfully. The pilots discontinued the approach, set the aircraft into a circling holding pattern over the pitch-black Everglades, and turned their attention toward investigating the problem. They became so preoccupied with their search that they failed to realize the plane was gradually descending closer and closer toward the dark swamp below. By the time someone noticed what was happening, it was too late to avoid the disaster.
After the accident, investigators tried to determine the cause. The landing gear had indeed lowered properly. The plane was in perfect mechanical condition. Everything was working properly—all except one thing: a single burned-out lightbulb. That tiny bulb—worth about 20 cents—started the chain of events that ultimately led to the tragic death of over 100 people.
Of course, the malfunctioning lightbulb didn’t cause the accident; it happened because the crew placed its focus on something that seemed to matter at the moment while losing sight of what mattered most."
Its something to think about. After church I then went with the teacher of the lesson to visit another member of the ward who has been assigned to us to visit teach(a great and weird concept that I'm still learning to appreciate). It was a reawakening of how being a member of a community is supposed to feel. When you are responsible for helping someone else(and actually do something), it makes you feel a greater purpose in yourself. What do you think? Does being involved in a community make you feel better?
4 comments:
yes and no...i like being a hermit, and kevin and i were talking about this last night. it's really hard to break out of your routine and invite people over or go over to other people's houses, or go to ward activities, especially when you have a crazy schedule like HA's and you can actually justify not ever going to enrichment activities or ward activities. one thing i wished as a HA was that we would hang out more outside the job, but i wasn't very good at coordinating that. it's much easier to go back home and hang out with your family...:) but i say...go for it!
I realized from your post that I have avoided all of my ward community events up to this point... but normally with a good reason -I was sick, it was far away and I didn't have a car, I didn't know where we were meeting, etc.
I think I'm like Emily, in that I like being a hermit... being an RA kind of worked well for me because I could lock myself in my private room and come out whenever I wanted to be social. Funny too, because my RA and HA friends were my favorite community to be a part of.
Now that I'm not in that super cool associate tri-hall group, the community I interact with the most are my classmates, specifically my classmates in the School of Family Life. I feel like we all understand each other better than the other communities that I am a part of-we have the same (or very similar) majors and normally for the same reason.
I kind of miss the community I lived in last year... with my 58 residents. I actualy knew everybody I lived around... I think I know like 5 people from my complex now.
Yes, being a part of a community is important to me. And, like the lovely lady above me, I agree that my HA community and RA community were the best communities I've been a part of. Take advantage of it megan. You'll miss it, (I know it's hard to believe sometimes), but you'll miss it a lot when it's gone.
I'm also serious when I say that any "community" you (specifically) are a part cannot help but benefit from your association. You and Oliver are amazing people with an amazing family. You have a gift for inspiration.
Thanks for the thought-provoking post.
I have definitely found it hard to become involved in the community, and very easy to find excuses. It's been especially tricky since I got married for some reason. But now that I look back, especially at my HA years, I really regret not being more involved. I didn't develop relationships as much as I could have, and as a result I don't have as many friends to claim from the experience as I would like. Thinking about that for the past year has given me a new perspective on what community means, and a new appreciation for it. Now I'm working on losing the excuses and becoming friends with my neighbors. And yes, I think being involved does make me feel better, because I feel supported and am also able to serve others since I know them better.
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